Mr. Wake

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Location: Kamakura, Kanagawa, Japan

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Pizza

I swear I have actually made some effort at collecting material for the sausage blogging project. But it's tough to polish my own stuff to perfection when someone else keeps doing a better job and delivering it right to my door. I give you the newest creation by Pizza Hut Japan. Take a second, click on the image, and see what we're dealing with. Just look at that crust, straining to hold in its meaty treasure.



The big red letters at the top say "Crispy baked sausage is delicious!" The white and gold at the bottom say "German King."


And what is the secret of the German King's deliciousness? That zoom in of the crustal cross section taps us on the shoulder and whispers it to us. "Delicious secret #1: the crust is full of sausage." OK, but that really stretches the definition of the word "secret," now doesn't it. But there is another. "Delicious secret #2: beneath the ring of sausage is a layer of bacon. And tucked beneath that is a layer of cheese!" (emphasis mine)
Elaine Bennes once said, "It'll be years before they find another place to hide cheese on pizza." Well, it did take years, but the Japanese finally figured it out: under the bacon, which is under the sausage, which is in the crust.

But the German King is not the only pie to feature this miraculous crust. Sausage also incircles the Shrimp and Egg Land pizza, as if the shrimp and egg combo on a pizza wasn't good enough. And as if the shrimp and egg and sausage and bacon and cheese combo wasn't good enough, it has been slathered in smooth, rich, piping hot mayonnaise.


If I worked for Pizza Hut I would have called this the Sausage Colliding Pizzacle Accelerator.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Charlie Harvey said...

The Pizzativistic Heavy Sausage Collider. The Large Hadron Sausager.

12:12 AM, March 23, 2006  
Anonymous Poker Tools said...

Should you tell you have deceived.

12:13 AM, June 09, 2011  

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